And a Merry Christmas to you Mr. Hoff (wink wink)

This one is for Wendy, Erin, Katie, and oh yes, yes indeed, you too Hilary...

Wendy's Forehead

In recent conversation with "the girls" it came to light that when Wendy was a kid she always thought that "forehead" was "four head" and actually had to do with the finger width of your, uh, well, forehead. So to her there were not only such things as "four heads" but also "three heads", "five heads", and theoretically even "six heads".
I love Wendy's stories! She always keeps me on my toes!
For future reference ladies and gentlemen, I have a "three head".

In other news, yesterday I informed Faith that the universal peace symbol with the dove, the dove is carrying a feather. uhhhh you know, since a feather would obviously inform Noah that there was dry land. At least I knew it was a leafy/feathery looking thing....Wow.

Still Listening

Still listening to Anne of Green Gables.
The person reading it now makes me want to shoot myself in the foot.

Question of the Day

If a movie were made about you and your life or at least a portion of your life what songs would be in the soundtrack? List five.....And I want participation people!

My soundtrack would include (Okay I did six- I mean seven):

1. Sisters, Sisters- (form White Christmas) it would be sung by the actors who play myself and Jenni, while trying to dance....
2. We are Going to be Friends- Jack Johnson for when I was a kid and Nicole and I used to go on adventures and cause trouble.
   
3. Somewhere Over the Rainbow/What a Wonderful World- Israel Kamakawiwo'ole for Tiffany's death.
4. Dreams- The Cranberries, because they have always been a favorite and would just fit with my soundtrack.
5. Landslide- Fleetwood Mac, just because I love that song....
6. And a couple Michael Jackson songs for memory sake:
1. Thriller- Lisa and I dancing and jumping on couches, sorry mom
2. P.Y.T.- Hilary's Version- If you don't know it you should ask. Think Julie Andrews.

Now its your turn! At least FIVE!

Anne with an "E"

Ever since I was a kid I have loved the "Anne of Green Gables" movies but could never actually get through the first pages of the book. It sat on my bookcase for years and now I am not sure that it is even there still. Last night I discovered a free podcast of the reading of it and decided that I would try listening to it instead. In case you were wondering, it is going much better than me reading it did (strange because I love to read, just don't give myself the time to). So far it is pretty good but sometimes the readers are really annoying.
Anyway my point in this post is to ask you a question that Anne asked Mathew on their way to Green Gables,
"Which would you rather be if you had the choice? Divinley Beautiful, Dazzilingly Clever, or Angelically good?"

Lifeisode 25-12-10

Lifeisode (noun 'lIf & "sOd also -"zOd, origins: Hilary)- an event in a person's life that is distinctive and separate although part of one's life as a whole.
Skipped church today and instead I am freezing in my living room. Serves me right I guess.

The Pleasure was all Sam's

I had the distinct pleasure of having Sam surprise me by peeing in the living room just as someone knocked on the door to come and look at the appartment. Oh the horror and embarassment of it all! Bad, bad, bad Sam. I was not pleased.

The Guilty Party:

heated shoes

Just so you all know, I have now placed disposable heating pads in my shoes. They make stupid crinkley noises when I walk and look like maxi pads but they are oh so warm. Now if only I could stick some to my hands.

Frostbite vs. Carbon Monoxide Poisoning

My office temperature is like 10 degrees Fairenhieght and my toes might fall off, so naturally I turned on the heater. The heater we were told was broken and needed replaced, however the other day it turned on by itself so we thought "cool, it works now". Nay my friend. Apparently the fix-it guy got it to turn on but discovered it was emmiting Carbon Monoxide and then just didn't tell us.
If I am found sleeping at my desk don't worry about disturbing my nap, its not a nap, try to wake me up.
So here I sit, paranoid about Carbon Monoxide Poisoning and loosing the feeling in my feet by the second.

Athlectic

Recently in my inbox as a response to my search for another roommate (Kim is rooming on campus next semester):

Ok well these is little about me ,I am flirtatious and a thrill-seeker. I am as funny and alluring as ever. I also have a confidence that is very attractive I am the type of person who enjoys having alot of fun and that is so easy going you will love it! My personality is I would say kind of generous and kind. I am 5'7" I am happy, athlectic, adventurous, spontaneous, elegant, and smart. I love to play basketball and i rank it as the neatest game on earth.I have a great career because of the assets in my inherintance,anyway that is confidential. I love the movies, concerts, and live music and just reading the paper is so nice.

What? By the rest of the email I am pretty sure it was a scam. But fun to read! People are so strange....

Sooo Sleepy

Halfway through the day at work and I have:

1. Caught up on all of my work
2. Answered a total of 5 calls, one person calling in sick (so not needed since its me myself and one of the guys in the back office here today), one sales call, two wrong dials from the same person, and one call back from Jenni.
   
3. Its gonna be a long 4 more hours.
4. I have also, you lucky goose, now blogged twice today.
   

I want this:

Hilary had the most beautiful necklace on last night and left it on my counter. I took it upon myself to go ahead and wear it today. You know, for safe keeping.
It looks like something a movie would be based off. Kinda an antiquey look, gold, round pendant with a tree cut out that is off centered. Maybe its a key to One-eyed Willy's treasure.
And then today I was browsing Apartment Therapy New York and found this bed. It reminds me of The Chronicles of Narnia : Prince Caspian when the children are sleeping under the stars in the ruins of an old castle they later discover to be Cair Parival.
I want it! It is so beautiful. I do believe it is my romantic side coming out... I am not sure about the nest though. That's just plain weird.

"I want the World! I want the whole WORLD!" (Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory)

Thanksgiving Day Quote

While playing Catch Phrase (oh she is gonna kill me...)

LaDonna : "Like if I wanted to make a lot of money..."

Everyone: "Breed"

What? FYI the begining of the explanation had something to do with bunnies, but it was just funny how these fit together. Apparently Ladonna can make a lot of money breeding....

Happy Birthday Lisa

Happy Birthday Lisa!
You are officially in your mid-twenties!

I am more excited then you are!

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix



I cannot wait!

For Someone Special...

I love Buddy the Elf. And the movie Elf. Thanks Lisa for reminding me!

Shopping/ Hilary

Shopping, Hilary and Apple crisp. These are a few of my favorite things!
Yes like the song.

Waiting for dishes and Apple Martini's

1. I have the worlds lowest Alcohol tolorence and therefor don't drink it very often
   
2. The difference between rum and vodka is that rum doesn't hit me very fast and vodka, after one sip makes my ears and face turn bright red
3. I waited all day for a package of dishes my parents sent me only to have it arrive when I wasn't home anymore. Luckly Kim was and so I got them
4. Some of my dishes where broken. Boo for Fed ex

Thanksgiving Groceries

I went and bought Groceries on Friday for Thanksgiving at Erin and Andy's (side note, I Love those two!)
What is it with people in grocery stores around holidays? Such anger. I was standing between two lines checking out which would be shorter and noticed this lady behind me. I appologised, even though I was only there for like two seconds, for real, not even exagerating. The Lady then had the NERVE to say in some not so nice tones, "WELL, I AM WAITING TO SEE WHERE YOU GO!" Woah Lady, calm down. Cut in front of me for all I care. I wouldn't want you to bite my head off or anything. Sheesh! Its Thanksgiving people. And as Faith would say (in laughter, because she thinks she's really clever, she is) "A time to be Thankful and give".

Joe: "Happy Thanksgiving." (brief moment of silence) "It's your turn to say 'Happy Thanksgiving' back."
Rose: "Happy Thanksgiving... back."
from You've Got Mail... again (BTW I am not obsessed with the movie, kinda, it's just a good one to quote from)

I am trying to catch up!

First I need to start some coffee.
Better.
Okay
Wednesday:
Went shopping for Tina's "Decor" for her Birthday desk...
Thursday:
Got up early and in the office by 645 to decorate Tina's office only to find she was already there. Humph! What kind of psyco gets to work that early except one that wants to annoy and decorate her friends desk? Luckly she didn't see me and went back home for awhile and I was able to do the job.
Samatha had her teeth cleaned and pretty much hated me by the time I picked her up from the vet at the end of the day. Do you see how clean they are? I know what you are thinking Katie, "sick!" I just think her teeth are funny. LOL

Tuesday

Forgot about a meeting at the office and was suprised when the person showed up....Ooops....
"I, uhhhh thought it was on Wednesday the 14th."
"No, it is for the 14th, which is today, a Tuesday"
"Right. "
I guess I should use my outlook once in a while.
And then the guy was super nice but one of those people who have a really soft voice you can pay attention to. I am pretty sure I gave him a few blank looks.

Went to Ryan's house and practiced our portrait shots. Tried to convice Chris to take pics with us but she settled for being the "Sun Gun Girl".

Monday

Work, and two clients at night. Cha- ching. The clients had two adorable Jack Russell Terriers. ADORABLE.
Speaking of adorable here are some pics of the nephews...
Andrew has a punch mustache and


















Joshy is a Grumymcgrumpersonbecauseaunttamaratookmygameboyaway.

Sunday

Hung out with Mike and Lisa! Cemented a new tradition of a $1 store trip when we see eachother to buy eachother pointless and hideous things like Lime-Green Geometric purses and matching slippers with sequin boarders or "Potty Training Award" badges and flashing disco glasses (strangely also lime green) with a matching scarf.

Drank Coffee and headed to the airport- again.
Hilary is a doll and picked me up again. My hero. Oh and on the plane a sat next to the strangest women I have ever laid my eyes on. The only word that could describe her would be "awkward".

Saturday

My Mom's actual Birthday, no wait, that sounds funny, my Mom's Birthday. But celebrated my Grandma's 80th Birthday which was actually not until Monday the 13th.




















We had a surprise party and she had no idea. She scolded my Uncle but wouldn't have traded seeing her sisters, well three of them out of 5!, whom we fondly call "The Aunts" (you know like from Sarah Plain and Tall). I do believe I met a kindred spirit in "Aunt Dorine". She is the only person I have ever known to give my Uncle Jim as hard of a time as he gives everyone else. If I believed in Karma, then that would be what put an "Aunt Dorine" in Uncle Jim's life! HA! She told me some funny stories one of which she chased him around the house with a dill pickle. Oh man oh man, poor Aunt Barbara.
Ended the day going to Aunt Marsha's house and shocking my mom with another cake of her own.

Friday

Went to my parents again and was greeted in the Airport by my adorable nephews that are now to my shoulders. Dang. I am short.

Coffee

"The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the hell they're doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino."
Tom Hanks, as Joe Fox
You've Got Mail
(of course, would you expect me to quote anything else...)

Today I was dupped into buying a tall black and white mocha for, hold your breath here and take a seat, $3.35! Pah! They never cost that much! Its this stupid lady that likes to charge me for a white mocha instead of a regular one. I just don't like her. humph.
On the other hand, yesterday I went in and my favorite barista gave me a free starbucks drink coupon based soley on what I believe to be my good looks alone.
I mean if I were him it would be difficult to resist something like this:

Quote of the Day

"If this is the deal-breaker between us, I will allow Pepsi products in my home, but never shall lips that touch Pepsi touch mine!"
- Wendy Johnson

Thanks Wendy, I will remember that.

Ways NOT to pick up on a guy- by Kim

Walk by a Cinnabon, hold out your hand and say "ahhhhhh!" with lust in your voice, only to have a guy walk between you and the Cinnabon Eatery.
At least she gave the guy an ego boost, purposefully or not...

But of Course, The MOST incredible!

I had the most incredible sandwhich at lunch today. It was amazing.
"Thanksgiving on a Bun"
Hoagie roll, ovenroasted turkey, cranberry relish, a smudge of mayo, and fresh stuffing.
Delightful!

And just so you all know I put a Cornucopia out on the front desk and put all the candy in it to make it all festive. It didn't go over well with the boss. I took it down. Bah-humbug.

To Clarify

That doesn't mean I want to cancel all plans, just sometimes when they do get cancelled its an unexpected surprise.
And just for the record, I don't like cancelling plans I was looking forward to because drivers are distracted and rear-end me. And I don't like being rear-ended.

Just so you know

Sometimes I delight in cancelling plans. It makes me feel free to do whatever I want.
Possible options:

1. read
2. watch my netflix that have been sitting there for two weeks
3. blog
4. call someone who I know I will end up talking to for-like-ever.
5. Debate with someone about whether or not "for-like-ever" is a word.
6. Tweak a bunch of pictures in photoshop to see what I could do with them
7. make a fun new playlist for my ipod.
8. figure out why Greys Anatomy is not showing up on my ipod anymore.
9. run around the house chasing my dogs with their toys.
10. clean my attention starved room.

Catch-up, Catsup, ketchup, catchup

NaBloMo Catch-up due to no internet

Friday, Five highlights from the day:

1. Suki got a haircut Thursday and was even cuter when I woke up on Friday.
   
2. Tina picked me up in the morning and brought me coffee and a scone, YES!
   
3. I worked.
   
4. I went to the airport to wait for a plane that was supposed to board at 645 and didn't board until 845.
   
5. Sweet.

Saturday, the day of stupidity and things going nothing like planed:

Had a moving sale with the parents. We were supposed to be open from 9-2 so naturally people showed up at 815 and we sold half the garage by 9. Stupid people buying our books make stupid comments and I want to kick them in the shins. We sold a lot more used shoes than I could ever imagine people would buy. My Mom held her ground and wouldn't sell something for even less then she was.
Had no idea I would be seeing my aunt and uncle from Michigan and did.

Sunday, Flying Lazy:

Flew back to SD in the morning. My flight was late agian. They hit a bird on landing and had to do some clean up. Yuck.
Hil picked me up and we had lunch and deep conversation catch-up. On a side note I had a soda that tasted like it had cleaner in it.
Watched two movies that night.

Monday, Internet but no time:
Worked. Took Tina to Chula Vista and ate some soup with her Aunt and Uncle and cousin.
Caught up on Smallville and CSI.
Okay Smallville basically told you what will mark the end of the show. He only has one task before he faces his destiny and gets his training! I don't want Smallville to end!
And then there is CSI, like seriously what was the deal with Grissom? I can think of two senerios. Whats your opinion?

So there you have it. My weekend and catch-up.

What are you reading?

1. Grab the nearest book. If you are currently reading something, that'll be fine too.

2. Open the book to page 123.

3. Find the fifth sentence.

4. Post the text of the next 4 sentences on your Blog along with these instructions.

5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet I know that is what you were thinking!

6. Tag 5 people

I cheated and used Allie's book because I don't have one with me. Now I kinda want to read it and find out what happens...

"I wondered if he was asleep downstairs or whether he was waiting to come in and kill me. So I got out my Swiss Army Knife and opended the saw blade so that I could defend myself. Then I went out of my bedroom really quietly and listened. I couldn't hear anything, so I started going downstairs really quietly and really slowly."
the curious incident of the dog in the night-time
by Mark Haddon

Alright Katie. I will try too. NaBloPoMo

I had a funny Memory of Tiffany the otherday:

When I was about 6 I remember Tiffany running into the middle of the street by our house in front of my Mom driving and doing a sort of "neenerneeener"/ Shuffle Truffle thing. Her friend was over and they all laughed. I of course, being like any other 6 year old with an older sister, thought Tiffany was "so cool". So later in the day I saw who I thought was my Mom again (although her car was very visibly parked in the drive and she was inside and had been since Tiffany did the "neenerneeener"/ Shuffle Truffle thing) and promptly jumped out of some bushes and did the "neenerneeener"/ Shuffle Truffle thing only to halfway through the routine realise it was NOT my Mom and NOT a very pleased lady behind the wheel. Horrified of my mistake I did the only thing I could and leapt back into the bushes to hide from the shouting motorist. I will never forget the anger in her eyes and how she drove by in what I am sure was slow motion all the while saying something to the affect of "no, no, no, no no!" and shaking her finger at me.
I was apparently not as cool as Tiffany. There was no laughter in that lady's voice.

Three Amigos

Wherever there is injustice, you will find us.
Wherever there is suffering, we'll be there.
Wherever liberty is threatened, you will find...
The Three Amigos!



(and apparently a peacock)

A Pictorial Directory of Allie's Dilemma

The pictures. I think you will get the drift...

Pics of the hideous bald man with no clothes

Weird shiney outfits do not allow you to go on TV
















The extent of his dance moves















AND his Freakish brother.
Okay he is not as weird as he used to look. Poor Andy.

Rembember When ...

So I am watching Dancing With the Stars right now and Joey Lawrence was just on. EWWWWW! Sick! What happened to him?! Where is his hair and WHO told him he could wear THAT color?!?!?!?!!!
There is like no way to even explain it unless you saw it. I'll just have to wait and try to get a picture for you all (all meaning the five people who read this)

HUUUUAAAH! He is on agian! Seriously his outfit is the same color as him! And he doesn't stop talking! He is like a 15 year old cheerleader in a balding old man's body! YUCK!

The Characters

Partly because Lisa asked for an update(and I haven't sufficiently had time to think of anything witty or deep) and partly because Al made me think, I want to know who your favorite 80's TV show Character is and why.
I will start since I am asking...
Aside from the obvious choice of MacGyver for his innate sense of heroism and rugged handsome exterior, and ability to dismantle a bomb with a paperclip and credit card, my second choice would be:

Punky Brewster- Cute, Wholesome, great sense of shoe fashion I longed to copy as a kid, and her ability to find herself in some sort of trouble for every show yet somehow able to work it out by the end. It also helps that she had Brandon the Wonder dog...

98EE: An Illustration

The Set up:
An empty Parking Spot. A tad bit small, but could be the solution for your search.
Ego Emission of 6










Tam's Attempts:
Several tries only got her so far as to hit the curb several times. Not being a morning person, she gives up perhaps too early, but doesn't like people watching her try to park. :(
Ego Emissions of 3








Tina's Accomplishment:
Tina pulls into the infamous spot with alleged ease. Laughs when Tam tells her she tried to manuver that spot earlier.
Ego Emission for easily fitting into a spot that your friend attempted to fit in several times, 98.

Ego Emissions

Disneyland Lands Vs. Your Character

Hilary and I had a conversation a couple days ago about her time she worked at Disneyland and how Disney picks where you will work based on your look. ie. Rockabilly Kids and the like are usually placed in the Haunted Mansion and for some reason Peg-Leg Hilary was placed at the Blue Bayou. Arrr.
Anyway we decided that I would end up being a tour guide at Innovetions in Tomorrowland because Hilary says I have "futuristic hair" (don't ask, I have no idea).
So now I want to know where you think you would end up. Here are a few ideas to get you started:

• Tomorrowland
• Adventurland
• New Orleans Square
  
• Pirates of the Carribean
• Main Street USA
• Haunted Mansion
• Twighlight Zone Haunted Hotel
• Indiana Jones Adventure
• Tom Sawyer Island
• Mark Twain River Cruise
• Mad Tea Party
• Toontown
• Tarzan's Treehouse
• Jungle Cruise (Katie?)
• It's a Small World
• Space Mountian
• Splash Mountian
• ?
  

Worst

My attitude stinks and it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

"Have you ever become the worst version of yourself. That a pandora's box of all the hate, spite and condecension has sprung open? Someone upsets you and instead of walking away... you zing them. "Hello it's Mr Nasty". I'm sure you have no idea what i'm talking about..."
(Tom Hanks as Joe Fox in You've got Mail)

Exactly, I think I do and I am right now. I hold grudges, and have a hard time letting things go. I am full of anger and spite but instead of zinging people I usually (there are some exceptions) just stuff it all inside and pretend like I don't despise certian persons... Don't get me wrong, its not all the time, but sometimes I am NOT slow to anger and I let people and their attitudes get to me. And at times I feel like I have become exactly what I hate.

I need to work on that but I am not sure of my gameplan yet.

So sorry if I have ever been a jerk to you, I am working on it.

Fish, Gracie, Temple, Dancing Goat

Smashed by elevators

A few things from my Thailand trip so far:

1. Elevators hate me here and repeatedly smash me when stepping on or off of them
2. Gracie, Jenni's dog is adorable
3. I love shopping
4. Italian food in Thailand is not Italian food
5. The Puhcome (SP?) hotel sucks, and their toilets don't flush
6. A milk shake is actually a smoothie with fruit and ice just as a strawberry daquari is actually A LOT of alcohol and a teaspoon or so of strawberry mix.
7. Elephants are really cute
8. My hair is never in anything but a ponytail...

see you all when I get back!!!

Packing Stress

I should be packing right now. And I was packing, and I will continue packing in a moment. But first I have to catch my breath.
I leave for Thailand on Tuesday night. That's in two days. I still feel like I have a lot to do but I know I will get it done.
I have so far only packed Jenni's suitcase which, in case you were wondering, is bigger than mine. I did inform her however that I would be borrowing some of her new clothes while I am there. Tina suggested I should also ask her if I can borrow her underwear too. I am thinking not. That's a little too much....
There was such a HUGE response for the clothes request from Jenni that it is a bit overwhelming, but its kinda like Christmas. And who doesn't like Christmas?
Anyway sorry for the randomness. I will be getting back to packing now, even though I really want a nap like Kim is taking right now. Dang her.

Follow the Code

For Katie:

Tamara, your pirate name is
Deckswabber Maria Lindsey the Fearsome
Your Pirate Name

DJ Tam is fried

My ipod mini is fried. I bought a new ipod to replace it. It has video.

Just FYI

Terra Cotta Warriors

German man joins Terra Cota Warriors...
Pretty funny.

Her intentions fall to the floor.

I had every intention last night of going home, cooking dinner, and cleaning my apartment.

Instead I went shopping, bought food, and stayed up until midnight while Kim and I perused through my wardrobe and tried nearly everything I own on. At which point I realized it was midnight and I should probably get back to cleaning my room instead of making it more of a disaster.

“Could I be wearing anymore clothes?!”
Joey- Friends (for a better effect hold the “e” sound on “be” a second longer than normal)

FYI to the world

When I admit I have mathmatically done something wrong don't tell me ten times in a row that I am basically an idiot. I already got that.
One explaination of why I did something wrong is enough. When I say "Oh okay I see that. I did do that wrong." Don't use your condeming Mother voice to point it out ten more times. I am liable to get angry and storm away.

"I already told you, my therapist says I need an attitude adjustment."
- Lilly from The Princess Diaries

The Dangers of Letting Your Friend Check Their Email on Your Computer

It was a sunny day. I woke up, took a shower, made some coffee, and did my make-up. Katie showed up to go to lunch at Hodad's but since it was a lazy day I wasn't quite ready.
"You can go ahead and check your email while I finish up if you want." I shouted from my room. Mistake NUMERO UNO.
Oh, she checked her email alright AND went ahead and took it upon herself to write a blog for me.
Thank you very much Katie Gardner.
Mistake NUMERO DOS?
Not checking my blog or email after said Katie Gardner uses my computer. Even though I know what she is capable of, especially since we are kindered spirits and writing a blog for someone, on their blog, about how much said person loves me is sadly exactly what I would have done.

Well played dear Katie, well played.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Watch out for this one:

How much I love Katie

Today I am going to Hodad's with Katie. Now, let me tell you, this is one of my most favorite things to do.

1) because it's Katie
2) because it's Hodad's

My day will now be complete because:

1) Katie is my hero
2) Hodad's milkshakes complete me

Jenni

For some reason this quote came into my head. Just something Jenni said a few years ago that we laughed about for hours:

"Today was the most emotional day of my life. I laughed, I cried, I threw-up."

I am still cracking myself up...

Kim and I went shopping in OB recently and Kim bought some HUGE hoop earings. She of course was super stoked about them, claiming them to be "awesome". Before we drove home she put them on and with all the wittiness I could muster I said to her, "Oh, Uh Kim? I forgot to tell you, one of the guys from the monster truck ralley called and wants his rims back..." We laughed so hard we cried.
It was a wonder that we made it home without peeing our pants.
With that said, the earings do look cute on her but I am lucky she thought it was a funny as I did...

Harry and the Potters

My new heroes thanks to Katie.

Top 10 reasons not to leave your lunch at work over the weekend

1. Because it was a couple days old to start out with
2. Because you work in the front office
3. Because you will be able to smell it when you approach your desk
4. Because when you open your drawer you stored it in the smell will be SO bad that it will seep into the hairs in your nose and stay there for the remainder of the day.
5. Because Wisk does not get rid of the smell
6. Because when you lift up your Urkel Lunch Box you will remember that it has a hole in it only a minute too late.
7. Because APPARENTLY when you leave turkey chili in a hot office for the weekend it liquefies and spills out of its container.
8. Because when it spills out of the container you again remember the hole in the Urkel Lunch Box because now the liquefied chili is all over your pants and the floor.
9. Because now your coffee is cold and you don't really want to drink it anyway because all you can smell is the "chili" and the thought of drinking that "chili" well, you can imagine...
10. Because there are only so many times you can apologize to those around you for the smell you can only describe as throw-up.

Fed Ex hats are all the rage.

The Fed Ex guy, Matt, informed me yesterday that not ONLY is a Fed Ex envelope useful for shipping things, BUT it also doubles as a "Fabulous Hat". I would have to agree.

Things to do

1. Paint
2. Chase another sunset around a city
3. Take pictures in costumes
4. Make Turkey Chilli
5. Sit on Suki's chicken toy until she can't handle it anymore and does that cute little howl
6. Read a book
7. Sew something
8. Sit in your hammock chair
9. Bake some breakfast bread
   

Be afraid, Be VERY afraid...

Dear Mr. Former Congressman

Dear Mr. Former Congressman Meeting in our office,
Please do not answer your phone in the middle of a meeting and come out and stand in the reception area and talk to someone about your prostate problems. We don't want to know.
Sincerely,
Tamara and Allie
PS. Happy Birthday, Allie really likes your new shorts. They were definetly not the "wong" descision. Your humor astounds us.

Re: Reasons to Watch MacGyver - The Whole Story

Alright! Alright!
Some people want the whole story instead of the abbreviated one. And so Here it is :

We (Lyndsie, Hilary, Ryan, Tina and myself) went to Ensenada, Mexico this last weekend to relax at Hilary's Dad's house on the beach.
On Sunday we decided after having a full day seeing the sights the day before, we would relax at the house and do some boogie boarding and sunbathing (or in Hilary's case have a group of 3 twelve year olds stare at her while asleep sunbathing...). Now mind you we were also planning to leave on Sunday but didn't want to rush ourselves.
So all the girls decide it is time to brave the waves and see what kind of damage we can do with the boogie boards. Pretty soon Ryan comes out too with his camera to catch some of the action (that sounds dirty, it wasn't, but in reality I really suspect Ryan was hoping to catch one of us being wiped out by a wave. I think we did okay though...) At this point Hilary decides to get out to watch our stuff and give Ryan a chance to board some too, but instead after she has a long winded conversation she returns to the water and tells us Ryan closed the door behind him when he left the house and realized someone locked the bottom lock. Snap.
But it seems that one of the neighbors should have a key so Hilary heads back out with Ryan to find said neighbor.
After a while longer boogie boarding Lyndsie, Tina and I think it is taking them forever and decide to head in also. We find Hilary and Ryan peering through windows as though looking for a way in. No neighbor, no key. Apparently someone moved. THAT SUCKS.
So there we are soaked to the bone in our bathing suits and in a foreign country with no way into the house that holds our clothes, and I am assuming car keys. Hilary and Ryan are hunched over staring at the lock willing it to open through telekinesis or something of the sort. I walk over and state the obvious "So the neighbor doesn't have the key? Hmmm. Well I have two bobby pins in my hair, I've seen MacGyver do this tons of times." Ryan gives the "yeah right" look and Hilary says we can try it. Ryan then proceeds to roll his eyes and walk away with his head in his hands.
So I take the bobby pins out of my hair and start to bend the pins like I have seen Mac do with paperclips to break into some inevitably top secret institution where they are using toxic waste to age animals at a rapid pace. "Okay, so MacGyver always bends them like this and then he sticks the straight one here and the bent one here and turns..." Click.
SHA-BAM!
The door opens and Tamara saves the day. Ryan stares in disbelief, and the girls cheer for my pure geniusness.

The lesson of the day? :
You can learn from MacGyver!

And Ryan- Yes I can hit a baseball and throw a football and yes, apparently I can open doors with bobby pins. You can close your mouth now. ( in the event that you think I am angry when writing these last lines, please know that I am laughing at myself! and in no way making fun of you, only myself...Do you still love me? Am I your worst enemy?)

Reasons to Watch MacGyver

I have recently had a lot of people make fun of me for watching MacGyver.
Jenni is the best sister ever and bought me the whole series on DVD. Naturally, as with every series I get, I try to watch at least one episode when I get home from work so I can finish the series. People think this is a lot of MacGyver for one person, and maybe it is, but seriously, its MacGyver, the guy who can get out of any situation using his most powerful weapon... his brain (that was on the cover, I am not kidding)
Well the point is everyone can learn from MacGyver.
My recent lesson:
How to use your brain and two bobby pins to open a door and save the day just like you've seen Mac do tons of times. And it helps when no one, even yourself, believe you can actually do it, especially after you mention "I've seen MacGyver do it tons of times!"

"I shall forever go down in history as the (woman) who opened the door!"

Captin Janeway

Last night I had the distinct pleasure of Captin Janeway peeing on me.
No not this one:











But something like This:







Please leave a comment if you have any questions.

The Elvin Language

I while back a Shawn told me that I come from a “happy little elf family” and it made me think…(that’s me thinking)… I certainly believe I have a pretty “happy” family for all the things we have gone through this year, which brings me to the reference that we are elves.

1. Most of my family is vertically challenged. And by “most of my family” I mean Jenni and I.
2. I like to say elfin phrases like “Someone has crammed 11 cookies in to the VCR” or “You did it! Congratulations! World's best cup of coffee! Great job, everybody! It's great to be here.” And of course referring to things as “GINORMOUS” instead of “gigantic” or “huge”.
3. It's just nice to meet another human that shares my affinity for elf culture.
4. I sing things instead of saying them on a daily basis because “The best way to spread Christmas Cheer is singing loud for all to hear.”
5. When I give directions I like to tell it like a story, for example, directions from the north pole to New York are as follows:
   ”pass through the seven levels of the Candy Cane forest, through the sea of swirly twirly gum drops, and then (walk) through the Lincoln Tunnel.”

So mayhap we are a “happy little elf family”, but I like it that way.