Harry and the Potters

My new heroes thanks to Katie.

Top 10 reasons not to leave your lunch at work over the weekend

1. Because it was a couple days old to start out with
2. Because you work in the front office
3. Because you will be able to smell it when you approach your desk
4. Because when you open your drawer you stored it in the smell will be SO bad that it will seep into the hairs in your nose and stay there for the remainder of the day.
5. Because Wisk does not get rid of the smell
6. Because when you lift up your Urkel Lunch Box you will remember that it has a hole in it only a minute too late.
7. Because APPARENTLY when you leave turkey chili in a hot office for the weekend it liquefies and spills out of its container.
8. Because when it spills out of the container you again remember the hole in the Urkel Lunch Box because now the liquefied chili is all over your pants and the floor.
9. Because now your coffee is cold and you don't really want to drink it anyway because all you can smell is the "chili" and the thought of drinking that "chili" well, you can imagine...
10. Because there are only so many times you can apologize to those around you for the smell you can only describe as throw-up.

Fed Ex hats are all the rage.

The Fed Ex guy, Matt, informed me yesterday that not ONLY is a Fed Ex envelope useful for shipping things, BUT it also doubles as a "Fabulous Hat". I would have to agree.

Things to do

1. Paint
2. Chase another sunset around a city
3. Take pictures in costumes
4. Make Turkey Chilli
5. Sit on Suki's chicken toy until she can't handle it anymore and does that cute little howl
6. Read a book
7. Sew something
8. Sit in your hammock chair
9. Bake some breakfast bread
   

Be afraid, Be VERY afraid...

Dear Mr. Former Congressman

Dear Mr. Former Congressman Meeting in our office,
Please do not answer your phone in the middle of a meeting and come out and stand in the reception area and talk to someone about your prostate problems. We don't want to know.
Sincerely,
Tamara and Allie
PS. Happy Birthday, Allie really likes your new shorts. They were definetly not the "wong" descision. Your humor astounds us.

Re: Reasons to Watch MacGyver - The Whole Story

Alright! Alright!
Some people want the whole story instead of the abbreviated one. And so Here it is :

We (Lyndsie, Hilary, Ryan, Tina and myself) went to Ensenada, Mexico this last weekend to relax at Hilary's Dad's house on the beach.
On Sunday we decided after having a full day seeing the sights the day before, we would relax at the house and do some boogie boarding and sunbathing (or in Hilary's case have a group of 3 twelve year olds stare at her while asleep sunbathing...). Now mind you we were also planning to leave on Sunday but didn't want to rush ourselves.
So all the girls decide it is time to brave the waves and see what kind of damage we can do with the boogie boards. Pretty soon Ryan comes out too with his camera to catch some of the action (that sounds dirty, it wasn't, but in reality I really suspect Ryan was hoping to catch one of us being wiped out by a wave. I think we did okay though...) At this point Hilary decides to get out to watch our stuff and give Ryan a chance to board some too, but instead after she has a long winded conversation she returns to the water and tells us Ryan closed the door behind him when he left the house and realized someone locked the bottom lock. Snap.
But it seems that one of the neighbors should have a key so Hilary heads back out with Ryan to find said neighbor.
After a while longer boogie boarding Lyndsie, Tina and I think it is taking them forever and decide to head in also. We find Hilary and Ryan peering through windows as though looking for a way in. No neighbor, no key. Apparently someone moved. THAT SUCKS.
So there we are soaked to the bone in our bathing suits and in a foreign country with no way into the house that holds our clothes, and I am assuming car keys. Hilary and Ryan are hunched over staring at the lock willing it to open through telekinesis or something of the sort. I walk over and state the obvious "So the neighbor doesn't have the key? Hmmm. Well I have two bobby pins in my hair, I've seen MacGyver do this tons of times." Ryan gives the "yeah right" look and Hilary says we can try it. Ryan then proceeds to roll his eyes and walk away with his head in his hands.
So I take the bobby pins out of my hair and start to bend the pins like I have seen Mac do with paperclips to break into some inevitably top secret institution where they are using toxic waste to age animals at a rapid pace. "Okay, so MacGyver always bends them like this and then he sticks the straight one here and the bent one here and turns..." Click.
SHA-BAM!
The door opens and Tamara saves the day. Ryan stares in disbelief, and the girls cheer for my pure geniusness.

The lesson of the day? :
You can learn from MacGyver!

And Ryan- Yes I can hit a baseball and throw a football and yes, apparently I can open doors with bobby pins. You can close your mouth now. ( in the event that you think I am angry when writing these last lines, please know that I am laughing at myself! and in no way making fun of you, only myself...Do you still love me? Am I your worst enemy?)

Reasons to Watch MacGyver

I have recently had a lot of people make fun of me for watching MacGyver.
Jenni is the best sister ever and bought me the whole series on DVD. Naturally, as with every series I get, I try to watch at least one episode when I get home from work so I can finish the series. People think this is a lot of MacGyver for one person, and maybe it is, but seriously, its MacGyver, the guy who can get out of any situation using his most powerful weapon... his brain (that was on the cover, I am not kidding)
Well the point is everyone can learn from MacGyver.
My recent lesson:
How to use your brain and two bobby pins to open a door and save the day just like you've seen Mac do tons of times. And it helps when no one, even yourself, believe you can actually do it, especially after you mention "I've seen MacGyver do it tons of times!"

"I shall forever go down in history as the (woman) who opened the door!"

Captin Janeway

Last night I had the distinct pleasure of Captin Janeway peeing on me.
No not this one:











But something like This:







Please leave a comment if you have any questions.

The Elvin Language

I while back a Shawn told me that I come from a “happy little elf family” and it made me think…(that’s me thinking)… I certainly believe I have a pretty “happy” family for all the things we have gone through this year, which brings me to the reference that we are elves.

1. Most of my family is vertically challenged. And by “most of my family” I mean Jenni and I.
2. I like to say elfin phrases like “Someone has crammed 11 cookies in to the VCR” or “You did it! Congratulations! World's best cup of coffee! Great job, everybody! It's great to be here.” And of course referring to things as “GINORMOUS” instead of “gigantic” or “huge”.
3. It's just nice to meet another human that shares my affinity for elf culture.
4. I sing things instead of saying them on a daily basis because “The best way to spread Christmas Cheer is singing loud for all to hear.”
5. When I give directions I like to tell it like a story, for example, directions from the north pole to New York are as follows:
   ”pass through the seven levels of the Candy Cane forest, through the sea of swirly twirly gum drops, and then (walk) through the Lincoln Tunnel.”

So mayhap we are a “happy little elf family”, but I like it that way.